Looking back on a first year, A letter from a friend to her daughter.

There are so many things to look back on when we are having a first birthday. Milestones, lessons learned and the fun we have had. But when we are having a first birthday something else is happening. It's not just a milestone for the baby. It's also a milestone for the ever evolving family. The parents are no longer new parents. The siblings are changing their relationships slowly. The baby is now a toddler. There is often a lot of celebration and joy- there should be! but often times we forget to reflect on what was. So we can move forward and not feel like we are losing something. Rather gaining. The following is a letter written by a dear friend to her daughter on her first birthday.

Dearest Baby Girl

                 

The most wonderful thing happened. It was you. You came into our lives and brightened our day. I had such a hard time in the beginning. I thought I should know everything about you inside and out from the moment I saw you. 

I thought that I should know  your every need, want and thought. But the reality of it was...Mommy didn't have a clue. I thought I would have that feeling of "the most beautiful creature is here. I have never loved anything more than this beautiful little girl" I loved you of course. But mommy was in a fog.  It was a long time before I did have that feeling of absolute wonder that was you. 

But I realized that we just needed to spend time together. So we brought you home. We introduced you to your best friend for life, Sadie. You two were instant best friends, but perhaps that is because Sadie loved sleeping on my belly keeping you warm. 

The first couple of months was a sleepless blur. Mommy kept trying to do too much, keep a house clean, grocery shop, take care of your brother, I forgot to eat, sleep, and take care of me. A wise and dear friend gave me the best advice. She told me to stop it. She told me to spend a whole day in bed with you, doing nothing but having cuddles and naps. So that is what we did. And it was probably then that I fell in love with you and all that you are. I was your momma, and you were my sweet baby girl. 

I knew it would be hard, and that we would have tough times, but you knew that I would always be there for you. The first 9 months you needed to always be attached to me, these next 9 months you need to always see me. And the next 9 months after this, you need to know you can always find me.

This last year has had so many neat things happen. Daddy and I made so many decisions for you that we knew were the best thing for you. Every decision we made was with you in the foremost of our thought. We decided to cloth diaper you. I love your fluffy bum scooting around, I love that you never got bum rashes because of the soft material you sit in. We decided to breast feed you exclusively. I loved those moments. I will be sad when we stop breastfeeding, they are our special moments where I can play with your hair, and touch your soft skin and feel your hand on my chest.

We chose to potty you from a month old! You and i jumped and danced around the first time I caught your first pee. What a fun moment that was. And the first time Daddy caught his. So neat. I love that we know your needs like we know our own. What a special connection we started there. 

We fed you what we ate from 6 months old. No need for baby food. You were Natalie, you knew what you were doing and what you liked!! 

And with that came sign language. You needed an easier way to tell us what you needed. So we gave you another way. I loved that you could specifically tell us what you want at such a young age.  All of these decisions were thought through meticulously, and were done with love. We had many problems with people accepting our decisions. But at the end of the day, you lived here. With us. So we made the decision. And I think mommy and daddy made the right one. And you had no complaints either! ;) 

You made many decisions too. Like being the best at giving hugs and kisses. Knowing when you were going to crawl. Knowing what you loved to eat and what you did not. We gave you choices about everything. What to wear, what to eat, when to potty or not. You truly were too smart for your own good. Especially when it got quiet... Mommy and Daddy knew to find Sadies food as you were probably in there!

This year truly went by too fast.  You are one year old. How did that happen? From me trying to figure out who you are, to being hardly able to keep up with you. Mommy and Daddy have so many dreams and hopes for you. We are so lucky to have you in our lives. And that you picked us to be your parents. You are becoming the funniest, most caring, most adorable little girl we know. We cannot wait to see what the future holds for you and how many adventures we will go on! Mommy and Daddy love you so much duber doo.

xoxo